I have known for a long time that my frustrations block my flow. I get so annoyed and focused on what is not working, that I cannot see what is working – and a lot is going really well. I wonder if you are the same? Sometimes I cannot allow myself to feel good or appreciate what I have, due to focusing on the negative.
So when I try to focus on letting my intuition guide me, often my frustration is in the way. I can’t hear my intuition – all I hear is my fear and my self-critic. My self-critic tells me that everything is on the brink of falling apart, and that things aren’t working, and that my reputation is slowly being ruined, and that it’s only a matter of time before I’m discovered to be a fraud.
How horrible we can be to ourselves!
Hence, I have been exploring why I find it so hard to allow myself to feel good. Why can’t I allow myself to focus on what is working, rather than what isn’t?
Part of the reason is that I feel that I need to give a lot, and prove myself through hard work, before I deserve anything in return. I feel deeply unworthy of money, attention, love, praise, and ease.
Taking it easy feels like I’m slacking off – and if I’m slack, I cannot justify my worth and my value. I don’t even know who I’m trying to justify myself to! My staff, my clients, my colleagues, my peers, my industry, or the world!?!
It’s a horrible cycle.
Instead, some of the self-love that I should be learning and practicing from Kim Morrison might undo this behaviour.