Recently, a informal mentor of mine died suddenly. I hadn’t really thought of him as a mentor until he did die, because I realised how much I still wanted to ask him, and how much he could have taught me still.
However, in reflecting on his life and how he behaved as a professional, this has been another huge growth curve for me. Because I realised how much I want to be like him and emulate him.
He was such a happy, positive person to every one of his staff. He was supportive, encouraging, generous, approachable, very articulate, and humble in his vast knowledge. When you lose someone, you realise how much you have actually lost or did not appreciate whilst you had them in your life.
It also caused me to reflect that I have taken informal mentors for granted in my life. I have not appreciated them or acknowledged them enough, and I have also tended to push them away because I do not like to rely on others. However, when I am in a formal coaching or mentoring relationship, I seem to value this more.
In the last twelve months, I have taken a big journey of self-development and changing my mindset, and I have to contribute a lot of that to a business coach that I am still currently in a coaching relationship with. I am reluctant to end that relationship, but my paid period is coming to an end, and I am wondering if I need to move on because I have learnt what I needed to.
I have also come to realise that I need to tell people that I value what I have learnt from them, and I intend to actually do this more regularly. I do not believe that I have learnt a whole belief or behaviour system from one person, but I have taken certain aspects and behaviours, and admired certain traits in many people, wanting to emulate those things. I need to acknowledge what I appreciate in others more, and to tell them before it is too late.
I have also learnt that I cannot do it all alone, and I believe that I will always have a paid mentor or coach in my life from now on – in various aspects of my life as I need it moving forward.
Please learnt from me, and don’t do things alone – find a formal coach or mentor in an area that you need help with – or look to those around you to appreciate traits and behaviours in them that you would like to emulate.